“Do you like cheese?” Classic phone prank now a major motion picture

This article was originally published almost 2 years ago.  It’s popularity rose to such heights that we were contacted by xtranormal.com to use our script in their marketing efforts.  Here is the movie and the original article that inspired it.  Since you are probably reading this at work we have posted two version of the [...]

The Legend of Obama Burgundy: His teleprompter works 60% of the time, all the time

It is a well documented fact that President  Obama takes his teleprompter EVERYWHERE.  He doesn’t just use it for speeches, but takes it to interviews, meetings, etc.  According to sources the times he has NOT brought his teleprompter with him, his speeches have been awful and he even enunciates the wrong words and says the [...]

13 Stupid Questions with Jason McMaster of Broken Teeth, Dangerous Toys

The economy has taken it’s toll on many industries, but nobody has been hit harder than the publicity department at Broken Teeth LLC. It is quite sad, but this company cannot even afford plastic cases or original copies of it’s artists music. Broken Teeth is one of several lesser known bands playing on Shiprocked, a rock and [...]

13 Stupid Questions with Atarilogic

Yo. While most (read: all) of our “13 Stupid Questions” interviews have been geared towards hard rock, our staff has a diverse taste in music — especially artists with a great sense of humor.                                         So, [...]

13 Stupid Questions with The Last Vegas

Have you ever asked yourself: “What would Motley Crue sound like if they did not have Vince Neil stumbling around the stage incoherently mumbling the lyrics to their greatest hits and instead hired Josh Todd of Buckcherry as their lead singer?” No. How about dreaming of a band that redefines sleaze, brings back the Sunset Strip in all its glory and offers original and insightful [...]

Yanni, Boxing the Clown, and Airborne Chairs – Your Sports Week in Review

By Ceon Foosheys   In an effort to be as vain as possible, I will now be compiling the weekly best-of-RUFKM Sports Twitter post, deciding which of my own brilliant tweets deserves more attention.  Instead of simply copying and pasting all of the tweets from the past week and calling it a day, I will [...]

13 Stupid Questions with Pure, Inc.

Thus far, Dave Rude of Tesla and Frank Bello of Anthrax have subjected themselves to our world famous “13 Stupid Questions.” As a result, they have become internet sensations and both have seen a huge increase in album sales. Naturally, other bands have been begging to also be interviewed. So, now we are proud to [...]

Fantasy Fest: Painted Nipples Approved, Toy Weapons Banned

The following is an “Are You F–ing Kidding Me?” Classic.  We have been too busy interviewing rock stars as of late for  our “13 Stupid Questions” series. For now, enjoy an insane tale of the RUFKM Crew in Key West last Halloween. Also, for the record, Key West does not have a governor, it has a [...]

The exciting finale of “Bad things don’t come in threes, they come in twelves”

(Part 2 of 2.  To read part 1, click HERE.) The next Monday I got a call from Saab saying my baby was ready. Awesome news! I had to pay only the $500 deductible. So off to the bank I went to get my money. I had to go during working hours due to the [...]

Bad Things Don’t Come in Threes, They Come In Twelves

So, a couple Fridays ago, I’m driving to work from my ex boyfriend’s house (we have amazing sex and I can’t stop doing it even though it effects my heart in a major way), and a semi’s tire de-treads in front of the car that’s in front of mine. Said car quickly and instinctively swerves [...]

Warrant’s Cherry Pie, Tawny Kitaen, and O.J.

      There are few times when a band releases a song and video that summarizes an entire genre. However, Warrant did just that in 1990 with the single, video, and album Cherry Pie. In front of a white background, the entire band dressed as firemen and hosed down Pamela Anderson wannabe Bobbi Brown [...]

How to get FREE Starbucks!

These are tough economic times.  Everyday you hear about how many billions of dollars are spent but, just like everyone, you’re thinking:  Where’s my personal bail out? Well, RUFKM has you covered.  The “Latte Factor” has hit Americans hard and they have cut out such luxuries like Starbucks out of their budget.  Not the editors [...]

Things We Weren’t Taught In School: Vol 1

The longer I live the more I see there are significant oversights in our education system. Certain things that come up on a daily basis but no one ever properly taught us. This recurring column will address some of those oversights. On Greetings and Salutations Is there anything quite as maddening as not knowing when [...]

Into Thin Air: The Boondoggle Expedition Company

One of the great fringe benefits of having a career in which you get to fly over 100,000 miles per year, mostly international, other than being stuck in a seat by the assorted incessantly talking wacko for a twelve hour flight to China, is that you get to read a lot. When I say a [...]

The Internet: Now with 250% more Truthiness*™

It happens to the best of us, I know. You are sitting at your computer, blissfully opening email. Caught up in the suspense and excitement that comes from such a task. “Who is writing me today?” you may wonder. More importantly, “Do they have pharmaceuticals available for purchase from Mexico?” “Can I get weapons grade [...]

Album Review: Tesla – “Forever More”

  In these times of uncertainty, there is nothing more comforting than something being exactly the way you expect and hope it to be. This sentiment can best describe Tesla’s Forever More, their first studio album since 2004’s critically acclaimed “Into the Now”.        I have been one of the few die-hard Tesla fans since their [...]

Sick and Tired

I’m sick. Not in a going-out-on-the-town-in-a-Little-Bo-Peep outfit-stalking-coeds-so-I-can-stab-them-in-the-eyes-with-a-screwdriver sick, but a cough-cough-hack-hack-groan-ugh-leave-me-the-fuck-alone sick. I don’t know how I got this way. I was fine, then the weather changed and now it feels like I have an anvil on my chest, my throat is lined with razor blades, and I have the attention span of Loose Cannon [...]

Hello! Your Government Here!! Have you made awful decisions in life? Don’t worry, we’ll bail you out!

Hello! How are you doing? This is your government speaking and I would like to talk to you about a few pressing issues.  Do you have no ambition in life? Are you a blood sucking leach of society? Have you made the business decisions of someone who thinks 2 + 2 = Jello? Have you [...]

Barack Hussein Obama Elected 44th U.S. President. Really?

Barack is our new president.   Whether you voted for him or not, there is only one socially acceptable response after hearing this fact: All together now……… Are You F—ing Kidding Me? Well, it looks like America really likes Greek columns, infomercials (The Sham-Wow is incredible), celebrity endorsements, and hated George Bush (we all did). [...]

Mccain, Obama, and the Ghost of Tim Russert walk into a bar…..

Hello! The ghost of Tim Russert here. In life I was a big, talking head and in death I’m literally just that. I’m a huge, floating cranium with a microphone. Oh, sweet irony. So, I’m in purgatory and one of my punishments is to be a moderator one last time. This time for RUFKM-TV. I [...]

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