Dark Horse Album Review: 11 New Nickelback Classics!

Let it be known that Chad Kroeger is a horny Canadian motherfucker. I know this because I can smell my own (minus the Canadian part) and I also conducted painstaking research that led me to this conclusion.  My first clue that the lascivious lead singer of Nickelback highly enjoys vagina and throat love can be summed [...]

Women are from Venus: The History of Dick Glitter

There are many unsolved mysteries in life and things that occur in nature that simply cannot be explained.      1. Global Warming 2. The Bermuda Triangle 3. Dancing with the Stars The greatest scientists, sociologists, and jackassorists, could break down the above for the rest of eternity but they would never be able to produce a [...]

RUFKM Scientifically Proven to be Wise Asses!

That’s right, bitches! According to the scientific blog analysis site as listed above, RUFKM.NET has achieved a reading level of COLLEGE (POST-GRAD)! And it’s all a result of the mastery of the English language that your Lyrical Maestro Boondoggle provides to you free of charge. As stated in our mission statement, we take our tomfoolery [...]

Westboro Church Sues RUFKM

Stumble It! To understand why A CHURCH HAS SUED RUFKM, it is advised to check out our epic battle vs. Westboro at HOMO: The Beginning and HOMO : This Means War. These are the (so-called) Baptist wackos behind the God hates Fags campaign whose leader, Fred Phelps, regularly shows up at soldiers funerals wearing a [...]

Into Thin Air: The Boondoggle Expedition Company

One of the great fringe benefits of having a career in which you get to fly over 100,000 miles per year, mostly international, other than being stuck in a seat by the assorted incessantly talking wacko for a twelve hour flight to China, is that you get to read a lot. When I say a [...]

RUFKM’s Mailbox of Insanity

We continue to receive massive amounts of Grade A ridiculousness, heapings of homage and ample dosages of insanity at rufkme@gmail.com that occasionally make us laugh out loud but normally make us run for cover, out of abject fear and horror, to the nearest bunker for safety. But none has been as deeply disturbing, filled with [...]

Boondoggle Endorses McCain

This is the worse election ever. Not only does it seem like the longest election cycle that mankind has ever been forced to endure, but we are left with a Morton’s Fork of a baritone speaking man-child whose greatest accomplishment to date is that he is running for president and an angry old guy whose [...]

RUFKM is added to Wikipedia … and then banned for life

As we find ourselves to be very important people and a vital part of American history, we added Loose Cannon’s and Captain Boondoggle’s biographies to Wikipedia. Things went… poorly.

Autograph of the Gods

Being the great Captain Boondoggle is exhausting.   But of course with such greatness, comes even greater responsibility. Responsibilities that include answering the emails, letters and other assorted requests of my ever-growing fanbase of Boondogglites. To stay ahead of the curve and to determine what next burden my celebrity status will bring me, I’ve been [...]

RUFKM : Quenching the Planet’s Thirst for Knowledge since 2008!

Since the beginning of time, man has been an inquisitive beast on an endless quest for knowledge. This pursuit led to scientific and artistic achievements like the invention of the wheel, the Polio vaccine, landing on the moon, Garbage Pail Kids trading cards, the ShamWow! and, of course, the Freedom Rock commercial.    RUFKM is proud [...]

O’Reilly and Barney Frank: Separated at Birth

Is there anything more satisfying, deeply disturbing or entirely hilarious as today’s cable news? To get the very best of this lunacy, I only go to the one and only, fair and balanced, undisputed champion of all things absurd, Fox News Channel. As luck would have it, I found myself watching the O’Reilly Factor the [...]

RUFKM 10-Question Celebrity Interview – Professor Cannon

In the beginning, there were no rock stars to ask 13 stupid questions…. but there was a world renown organic chemist from Purdue: Loose Cannon’s Dad.

The Day I lived a Cliche

“Kill two birds with one stone” “Think outside the box” “The straw that broke the camel’s back” Ah, cliches. You can hardly make it through a day without hearing a few. My fiance uses them all the time. When she meets people she should ask  “Do you speak Cliche?” It’s pretty much her second language. [...]

Know Thy Boondoggle

Not since Ron Burgundy has there been there been someone that perfects the art of being egotistical and completely unaware: Captain Boondoggle. He’s funny 60% of the time, all the time. In this exclusive interview, he reveals his softer, more sensual side.

RUFKM Worldwide Inc. Refuses Award, Creates It’s Own

(The following is a Boondoggle/Cannon/TylerDFC production. In other words, it took three monkeys to write this post. Also, click on the “listen now” button for maximum comedic effect. Enjoy!) Ahh …. memories. It seems like just yesterday the writers of RUFKM were merely writing stories about assorted tomfoolery for our own delight and, under some [...]

HFH3: Boondoggle Bites Back

As many of you already know, due to a recent exquisite series of posts Heteros for Homos: Part 1, and Part 2, and questioning the mental capacity of the Westboro Baptist Church, we have been threatened with legal action by said group of rabid chimpanzees. In a remarkable sign of humility coupled with a bad [...]

Heteros for Homos: Attack of the Homophobes

Today is a great day. No, make that a grand day. Quite possibly the best day of my life. We’ve received hundreds of emails at rufkme@gmail over the past several months but none greater than the one we received today from the Westboro Baptist Church in response to a recent post and our call to [...]

Piss Biscuits Solve Local Couple’s Argument

  I love my wife. Ok, Ok…….I can hear the snickering all the way over here in my little corner of cyberspace. I know what you’re thinking. The Dark Lord’s spouse caught him wasting endless amounts of precious time on a blog that Sheriff Cannon and Deputy Boondoggle think is the second coming of Esquire. [...]

Pure, Inc. “Parasites & Worms”

Let’s face it. American rock-n-roll and its most excellent sub-genre of metal is dead. Finished. Kaput. Finito. Over. What killed it is up to much debate. Some claim it was the grunge scene, others Limp Bizkit while even more claim that it was the fraud perpetuated by the evil empire of American Idol. From these [...]

RUFKM Celebrity Interview #1: Catherinette Singleton

NEWS FLASH!  RUFKM is dedicated to provide breaking news and this story is fresh off the wire.  Our “Week of War” will continue with part 2 of our Saga of Sludge tomorrow — or maybe it won’t since it’s Labor Day weekend.  Deal with it.   Enjoy this spectacular intermission!  At RUFKM.NET we are committed to [...]

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